Sometimes, we forgive those who hurt us but we hold the pain in our hearts. We hate them for the rest of our lives. Whenever we see them, we remember what they said. Years later if they have changed, we continue to backbite about them and claim to know their ‘true colours’. This is not true forgiveness. This attitude prevents us from attaining marifat ilaahi (the recognition of Allah). Our purpose is to recognise Allah in our life and to meet Him upon our death. For marifat to enter the heart, the heart must be clean. Only Allah should be in the heart. Move past anything and everything that comes in between you and Allah, as we are on a journey, we have bigger things to worry about. Jannah needs be earned, Allah’s pleasures needs to be attained. Where then, can we find the time to be petty?
Shaykh Yunus Patel رحمه اللّٰه would say that the one whose gaze/focus is on Allah, the Decider of all matters, will not waste time in petty issues. He recognises that everything happened by the will of Allah. Never mind who is right and wrong, focus on Allah. What will make Allah happy? Will it please Allah if we claim to forgive but then hate, backbite, slander and defame others? We know this will displease Allah.
Thus, forgive and forget. Meaning, rid your heart of any ill feeling towards the one who has hurt you. Say that I forgive you, please forgive me too. Never mind what happened, we are Muslim brothers at the end of the day and reciters of the same kalimah. Thereafter, if that person’s nature and habits are not conducive to yours, part ways with them. We are not obliged to study, work, eat and travel with them. But we are obliged to move on and remember Allah instead. May Allah grant us the ability to keep our focus on Him and not others, for that is true sincerity, aameen.
— Shaykh Dawood Seedat حفظه اللّٰه
Above is an extract from Shaykh’s talk on 14/1/19 in Masjid-ut-Taqwa, Pietermaritzburg. To listen to the full talk, please click here.
